I wrote and recorded this poem a few months ago and it's very personal. I didn't feel called to share it until now. It's my introspective flow on seemingly contradictory feelings(and so much more ;)). I'm sure i'm not the only one that has felt this way. It's serious but also funny in a way-well it makes me laugh- at myself. <3
I'll post the words to the poem below the recording of it. It's written in my own abstract way.
I'm not a Poet
i'm not a poet
I just need to write
I'm not a dancer
i just need to dance
I'm not a singer
I just need to sing
I don't know what i'm great at
loving?
seeing the Truth?
Empathy?
Are those worthy talents?
Are they even talents?
no those are choices
A lifestyle
I"m good at feelings
I sing them into peace
I dance away my loneliness
I love my solitude
I'm afraid to be heard
But i need you to hear me
I don't need your validation
I just want you to like me
i want you to see my soul
really i want you to think my soul is worthy
I'm confident i swear
I made you believe my awkwardness was just an act
so you wouldn't suspect i'm not great at everything
or anything
Well i do make excellent breakfast
and i can make you feel like a King
for the first couple of years
until you take me for granted and then i'm like the old shoes
sitting untouched in the back of the closet
I try and get your attention again and again
but your too busy for my small breasts and introspective intellectual babble
My voice is strong so i'm scared of it's power
You run away from it so i try and keep it hidden
I don't like speaking out but i have a voice so i should use it
I'm not a dancer
but i want to dance for you
I don't need your validation
I just want you to like me
I want you to see my voluptuous bold soul through my tiny vessel
I want you to make me feel like i matter
Im confident really
i know i am a sacred Woman
But You don't look at me the way you used to
Do you still see me?
I don't need your validation
I just want you to desire me
I don't need to perform for you
I'm not your entertainment
I do this for the joy of it
I sing to my plants and my pets
I sing for the sun and for everyone
Alone
in my room
I'm not a singer
I just sing magic alive
and i want you to hear me
I'm not a poet
I just need to write you a poem and share it
because i don't know what else i'm great at but being honest and vulnerable
I know that's profane and its beautiful
I'm a sacred woman
I'm not a poet